Why 29 is the New 21

I love the month of March. I get to celebrate my birthday plus my anniversary with my fiance. We've been dating for five years and are getting married in six months' time. Time indeed does fly when you're having fun.

It's also the time when summer turns to autumn and the Amaryllis belladonna flowers make their appearance. We don't call them March lilies in South Africa for nothing. They're fascinating flowers and I always look forward to seeing it. These "naked ladies" always stand tall and proud, resembling determination and radiant beauty. The Greek legend may have referenced them from a shy, timid nymph, yet they show strength and self-confidence. In a way, it reminds me of me.

So what if I have one year left before I am "over the hill". Spiritually, I don't feel old, except when a child calls me "aunty". I appreciate the respect but excuse my internal cringe... I still watch animation for goodness's sake.

What irritates me though is when people refer to sports stars as old when they get to my age. Why? I may not be flexible as I used to be when I practised rhythmic gymnastics twenty years ago (wow, that is a long time ago, isn't it?) but I still know how to do all the tricks with all the apparatus. Give me a few months of just practising routines every day (full-time) and I'm sure I can be on an acceptable competing level again. With age comes experience.

Even though I'm still figuring things out, there are certain things I have learned in my twenties, especially the last couple of years after my studies. While 21 may be the traditional number of coming of age, here is why I feel 29 is the new 21 as a grownup.

You know (more or less) what you want to do in life

Hopefully, you have already gone through your quarter-life crisis and figured out what your purpose in life is. And it's okay if you haven't figured it out yet. We'll just leave it for the midlife crisis. Just kidding! Don't stress yourself out over this. You don't need a clear idea. Just use the process of elimination. You'll still have many choices and uncertainties, but at least you'll only have to choose between vanilla, chocolate and strawberry ice cream, not 29 more flavours.

But what if I'm stuck with the same flavour of ice cream for the rest of my life?

Who says you can't mix vanilla and chocolate, or vanilla and strawberry? Heck, go for three flavours together if you're crazy enough! That makes life so much more interesting.

You know (more or less) who you are

There was a time where I went through an identity crisis, but that was mostly because I was stuck in a job that I disliked. Needless to say, you are not your job title. You are a person. You have a personality, likes and dislikes, good qualities and bad qualities. You know what drives you forward, and what drives you nuts.

Sure, you can work on your characteristics to become a better person, but you can never delete it from your personality. Sometimes it's circumstances, sometimes it's genetics. If you know what your stressors are, you can identify it promptly (with a little bit of practising) and lessen the effects.

You learn to love your body

Let's face it, the closer you get to your thirties, the slower your metabolism gets. I may not like my body every day, but I am learning to love it. It's not your fault that your genetics trolled you on the length of your toes. The only thing you can do is eat healthily, exercise regularly to work on your muscles and ignore your BMI number. Personal trainers and professional dieticians find this Body Mass Index (more like Bad Measuring Indicator) ridiculous, so why should I care?

There was a time in high school when my stomach was flat and my ribs were showing. And guess what: I was still overweight according to the BMI scale. Do I have to starve to death before being acceptable to those standards? I don't think so.

I used to feel self-conscious about my body until I realised that even "prettier" or skinnier girls have their issues. And besides, I barely had time to feel embarrassed while fitting on wedding dresses. Your body type is not wrong, it's just how you're built.

You know who you can count on

I met some of my best friends at university but still kept in touch with my close friends from school. I would sometimes read on Facebook of people complaining about being let down by their friends and I would think to myself "Wow, they're going through exactly what I went through in high school, but thank goodness I'm done with that period in my life".

Today I know exactly who I can count on. I am also lucky to have found a partner who is not only the love of my life but also my best friend. When I'm happy, I want my best friend, and when I'm sad or angry, I need my best friend. And that is very special to have.

29 is a symbolic number

While the number 21 represents your full transition into adulthood and responsibilities that are linked to it, the number 29 reflects your relationships and dependence with others. Number 2 is a symbol of relationships and companionships, while number 9 is about humanitarianism, idealism and tolerance. Therefore 29 is essentially the goal of maintaining coexistence with yourself and those around you. You cannot find happiness in people or things around you when you are not happy from within yourself.

We recently went to my school's ten year anniversary. It was interesting to see who has grown up and who has grown old. Seriously, I am the oldest one in my class and some girls looked like they were deep in their thirties...

I could have gone with the purpose to show off my fiance, to talk about my awesome new job, to brag about the fact that we own a flat and many other things. But strangely I didn't feel the need to mention any of this, unless when people asked. I didn't need to compare myself to any of my schoolmates, because I am already happy, and I am happy for them.

I still think I have nailed it though.

It's not how you're built, it's what's on the inside, your inner beauty, and whether you're not just surviving, but actually living (in real life, not on social media).

In the words of my favourite March flower: If you've got it, flaunt it!